Rain Falls on the TV Box

Rain Falls on the TV Box

Before the summer of 2010 I can’t remember a single important thing happening in my life. I guess that’s how it is in your early teens. As far as moments in my life that really shaped me before that summer where everything deconstructed and Max had to be sent away, I can remember just one significant day and that was when Reggie died.

Now Reggie was my dog. He was old for his breed so it didn’t hit me too hard to see him go, though in his last few months it was kinda hard to watch. A dying dog is just the worst thing to watch. He was always very delicate because he was the runt of the litter, but he was going on thirteen now so we figured he didn’t have very much time left.* My dad found Reggie in the bath tub, the one on the second floor. When my dad found him, he got one of our tent-tarps from out of the garage and bundled him up in it, He was not a huge dog so my dad didn’t have any trouble carrying him, even though my dad is about as old as they come. Funny thing though: (not that Reg dying is funny) My dad put Reggie’s body in a box we had laying around since we bought this huge TV that is in our Living room still, to this day, anyway after that every time I sit down and watch that TV, I think of how my Dad carried my dog out to the back yard in this big TV box, I just think things like that are kinda funny. Anyway after He took Reggie to the back yard he spent the rest of the day trying to figure out a way to tell us without a huge shock. I was probably the least shocked, my sister though, she was crying all day. A little girl crying is probably the worst thing in the whole world, and I don’t mean that in a bad way, I just mean it’s hard to watch. My dad was going on 59 at the time so he had seen a lot of death in his life, this didn’t really faze him. He was sad and everything, I don’t mean to say he wasn’t sad, but he didn’t show it. I think this was before my birthday so that means I was fourteen when this happened. Fourteen’s a tricky age because you are nobody.  When you are thirteen you are really somebody, not fourteen though. Anyway it must have been right before my fifteenth birthday ‘cause I remember this really long rainstorm the week of my birthday, real biblical stuff, but I think it was one of the first days of rain when Reggie died. My sister said God was crying. I kinda hope she was right.

So we all got together, the three of us that is, and I called my girlfriend Trista over as well as my best friend Max. Trista really connected with Reggie which was nice. It’s strange, because looking back on it Reggie wasn’t really nice to many people. He liked me and my dad fine, but he loved my sister. I don’t think he really liked my mom very much. The cat always liked Mom most, though. He was a big fan of Trista though, maybe even as much as Beth. Beth is my sister. Max always loved Reggie though, I always thought if I didn’t watch close enough He would steal my dog right out from under me. Max could be a real bastard if you weren’t looking.

So my dad called my mom to tell her and then she called me. She thought I needed to be consoled and all of that mother nonsense, but the truth is, it was nice to hear her talk. She kept going on about how He was a great dog and it was sad to see him go, I think she kinda expected me to be more beat up about it, I mean you are supposed to be real beat up about it when your dog dies. I guess either it hadn’t hit me yet or I really just didn’t feel it the way I was supposed to, either way she was sounding like she thought I was acting strange. Honestly I was acting strange, I couldn’t explain why but I just wasn’t feeling all that bad about it, I mean he was really old, is all.

Before Max and Trista showed up I helped my dad dig a hole in the back yard. In truth I could have done it all by myself but I felt like my dad legitimately wanted to help. And it felt good to have someone to talk to. I remember my dad telling me that we were technically breaking the law because we lived in an old part of town and the gas company didn’t used to bury their lines as deep, in the old days, anyway. When he told me that I said if they were going to arrest us, they’d have to bury the dog for us so it wasn’t in their best interest. That really got him laughing.

It started to rain about halfway through the digging which made us realize the hole was twice as big as we needed it to be for our deceased chocolate lab. We figured now it was deep enough to just bury the box with it, sort of like a casket.

Max and Trista showed up around 3:45 and we all gathered around the hole in the ground where we had already set the box in. Trista was tearing up, I swear. I said a few words about how Reggie was the best dog anyone could ask for, which I’m only half-sure of. Then Beth said a few words, she went on and on but not in a boring sense, I remember a lot of what she said.

“Reggie was more than a dog, sometimes he would give you this look and it was like he was right there, like a human. Reg always made me feel happy when I was sad, He was really smart and caring and full of love. My teacher said dogs don’t have souls but I know they do, just by looking at his eyes I know” Beth really had a way with words; She must have been in 7^th grade when this happened. She’s really good at English and stuff like that. She writes poems all the time and she pretends to hide them even though she wants everyone to read them.

My dad didn’t say anything about Reggie, which I understood, but it’s like, He and Reggie spent the most amount of time together, since when my family got him I was one year old and Beth wasn’t born. My mom travels for work a lot, but my dad is home most days. So he really taught Reggie most of his tricks and He house trained him and everything. He even named him after Reggie Miller, my dad’s favorite Pacers player.

During the service Trista held my hand, which I wasn’t too fond of. You must understand that I was in the presence of my family there would be no end to the mockery. I mean, it’s not like I didn’t like it, I did, so I just let her do it. Max stood at my left. I noticed his jeans were absolutely filthy. Mine were dirty from digging the hole but it looked like Max had just been rolling in dirt. I didn’t bring it up because my sister was talking though. After the service my dad and sister volunteered to bury Reggie and I was told to go get my friends some food.

We walked into my back door, which leads right into my kitchen. I always thought my kitchen had a strange smell, it kinda smelled like old carpet and food. It wasn’t a bad smell or anything I always just thought it was strange. My dad had bought some hot dogs from the store that he said we could have so we all had one, with some chips and some Coke that was in a two-liter that sat by the fridge. We all walked out on to my front porch which was a screened-in porch, still is today. I love the screened-in porch because it’s not inside or outside, it just seems to be the best of both worlds.

So it was pouring down rain by this time and we were all kinda tired, rain always makes me tired. The rain was making this beautiful smell inside the porch, the kind of smell that only comes around during a rain storm that is really giving you the business. Trista and I were on the couch out there that faces the window, Max was on the swing. Trista leaned on me, sort of laying down with her head on my thigh and her knees bent with her legs sortof tucked in between the cushion and the arm of the couch. It must have been really uncomfortable for her, but I think she knew I liked it. That’s the best, when a girl just knows what you like. The whole situation reminded me of a John Hughes movie. You see I’m quite a big fan of movies, John Hughes being my favorite director. The whole thing on the porch though just reminded me of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off The way Ferris and Sloane just connect. The movie never addresses a moment where Ferris and Sloane aren’t completely in love. That’s how I felt at this very moment; I was on top of the world. I was Ferris, and she was my Sloane.

We talked for a bit, I said a few things about how I never really remembered Reggie as a puppy then Max interjected: “Neil, do you think you and me will get a dog when we live together in college?” He paused “well if anyway”

I told him that would be fantastic but only if we could call him Victor Conners, who is a character in a series of books me and Max have read since we were little. Max and I were always talking about rooming together in college, which we realized was far too far away to give any serious concentration, not that I wasn’t considering it, I was. Trista laughed at us, she read one of my Space Proximitas books last November, at first she lied and said she really liked it. Later she told me she was more or less into self-reflections and humorous essays and the like. You see I’m not really a reader, the only books I have ever finished are the Space Proximitas books and they are printed at like a 7^th grade reading level. My sister read one of them when she was 10. It’s not that I’m against books it just seems like they take a very roundabout way of getting to the point.

The rain was really coming down hard when I saw the cat on the porch. She must have slipped out when I opened the door and now she was losing her mind with the thunder and lightning. Luckily for us we all loved the sights and sounds. My dad came out with a pitcher of lemonade and offered it to us, I gladly accepted it. It wasn’t like real lemonade or anything like that, I think it must have just been the Crystal Light stuff that mom keeps around, but it didn’t matter. Lemonade used to be my all-time favorite drink, there really was nothing like it. But anymore I just drink soda, Coke and Sprite and other stuff that gives you diabetes, not that I have diabetes.

It was more or less dark when Max had to go home, his parents were cleaning out his cellar and needed him to be able to get into the crawlspace, explaining the condition of his jeans. Trista got a ride to my house with Max so he told her he was about to leave. “It’s alright, my dad can take you home” I said, attempting to buy some much needed alone time with my girlfriend. Max took the hint and didn’t press any further.

We were alone on the porch when a cool air brushed in through the screen. It must have been getting kinda late. Probably around 7, our lemonade pitcher was nearly empty. She was leaning on me just the way I like, then she sat up like she was about to get up or something, but instead she kissed me. In all honesty she had never kissed me before. We had been dating for about four months, but we had never kissed. Maybe she thought I needed it on account of my dog dying or something, I’m not sure, but it was nice. You never realize how nice a kiss is before you have one, mostly because it doesn’t really make sense, I often think about things like that, but when it all comes down to it, some things just can’t be described.

Here’s the truth, I had never kissed anyone until that point. I know it seems kinda late but it’s the truth, in fact, Trista was the first girl I ever dated. It may sound kinda funny, especially since Max had his first girlfriend in the 6^th grade. It seems like everyone has their first girlfriend in the sixth grade, except me of course.

While it was happening, keep in mind I was somewhat blindsided when it happened, I didn’t know what to do. I started to hold on to her around her waist but it was kinda strange so I ultimately just put one hand in her hair and one at my side. When it was over I just started laughing, hell, I laughed my head off.

Then she just looked at me, her cheeks were red as anything, and she started laughing too. We must have laughed for five minutes straight. I’m not even sure why. Trista is probably only about three-fourths my height and she has this bleached blonde hair (natural) these days she has this purple streak going down the right side, back then it was all bright though. She has kinda these mousy features, and whenever she gets mad she gives off this really squinty look that I’m not too fond of. But her cheeks are the most amusing thing about her. Literally any time she has an emotion, her cheeks light up like Christmas. It’s the greatest thing.

I swear I was on top of the world. It’s one of those times you just wanna scream and make a total fool of yourself, but I tried to hold it in. She could tell I was happy though on account of my heart beating at six times its normal pace. All I could say to her afterwards was “Have you ever seen Ferris Bueller’s Day Off?”

“No” she said, although she seemed curious

“We’ll have to watch it sometime”

After that I can remember just talking with her for a while about assorted nonsense. Then it came time and her dad called and said he was coming to pick her up. I said goodbye and gave her a hug and one more kiss and she was off.

I just stayed on the porch and listened to the rain for about an hour. I really like just listening to rain, it is relaxing. At around 9 my dad called me to come inside for dinner. We just had frozen chicken sandwiches that were all right. Naturally my dad gave me hell about the whole Trista situation. I didn’t mind though, that’s his job. “So do you have any assignments due Monday?” he asked me.

“Um, just one but it won’t take too long” I paused to take a bite “It’s just a one page essay on the French Revolution”

“Ah,” He scratched at his beard “How’s that class going”

“Good, I don’t have many problems with social studies” I really don’t, I don’t know why but I have always had a lot of interest in history and stuff like that. It’s probably because you can really see how everything that’s around today got to where it is. My favorite part is when they talk about Pangaea and how when the Earth was young all the land used to be grouped up into one big ball. I always liked that, I don’t know why. Something about all the land being bunched together in one big ball interests me.

We ate dinner and afterwards I didn’t really feel like going back out to the porch so I just went up to my room. I always used to wish my room was bigger, I guess I just got used to it. My walls were dark red, not that that was my favorite color, that’s just how they were my whole life. My family had lived in this house my whole life which all of my friends thought was strange, but it was just normal to me. I just laid on my bed for a while, not really doing anything in particular. I’m a good thinker, I think. I like to think about a lot of things, my mom says that I think more than I should for my age. Usually I would go on the computer for like an hour but the week before my birthday, I didn’t want to. I know why too, you see my family shares a computer and my dad does all of his shopping online, well I knew if I got on the computer I would just look through the history and see what they got me. This year I didn’t want to do that. So I just sat in bed for a while and decided to call up Max.

“Whatup Samwise?” Max seemingly screamed into his phone.

“What’s going on Mister Frodo?” We didn’t usually use these names but we had just watched The Lord of the Rings marathon the weekend before so Max decided he would be Frodo and I would be Sam. Max always wanted to be the hero, I was ok with it this time because I always liked Sam better, as a character, y’know.

“Anything good on tonight?” Max said

“I don’t think so, It’s Saturday everyone’s out”

“Yeah…” There was a long pause “So what do you think about Caroline?”

“She’s nice enough” She really was. I used to have a thing for her back in 7^th grade, I never told anyone though, she wasn’t always the prettiest girl, but she had dyed her hair blonde earlier in the year and it was like she was a new person. Sometimes all a girl has to do is dye her hair or something.

“Do you think she’d be interested in me?” Max asked

“I don’t know man, try and present yourself to her, a lot of times that’s all it takes and then she will start noticing you”

“You think?”

“Definitely, it’s all about confidence” I was talking out of my ass, the thing is, I knew it. I had no idea about what I was talking about, I had dated one girl ever. I talk out of my ass sometimes. If I have a major fault, it’s that I talk out of my ass.

“I think I’m gonna call her next weekend, do you think that will work?”

“Dude, I can’t say for sure, but I think I have seen her giving you the eye” I said.

I hadn’t seen her giving him “the eye” Sometimes all you have to do is give someone a push in the right direction. I know Max would have eventually talked to her, but now that he knew I was on board he was more likely to do it. I always had a funny feeling as if Caroline liked Max. I always thought it would be cool to have a double-date. But then again Trista and Caroline weren’t really friends. Sometimes you just don’t think about that sort of thing.

After I was done talking to Max I went downstairs. My sister had gone to bed but my dad was still up. He was watching SportsCenter for about the third time. He was laying down on the couch with his torso propped up on the arm though, the way little kids sit on a couch. I sat down in the chair by the TV.

“You home for tonight?” He asked me like he was only half awake

“Yeah, when’s mom comin’ home?”

“Tomorrow afternoon” he said “Think of anything you want for your birthday?”

“Umm, well I have been thinking that maybe I want some new shirts”

“Clothes, eh? Well that shouldn’t be too hard, any video games?”

“Well,” I couldn’t think of anything, that killed me, I seriously could not think of a single video game that I wanted. “the Grand Theft Auto expansion packs are out now, that would be nice” Good save.

We just sat there and watched TV for God knows how long, it was nice, we didn’t talk much but I always appreciated the understood silence of our relationship. Neither of us are big talkers. I think I get that from him.

It was still storming pretty badly when I went to bed. I could tell my sister didn’t like it cause when I walked by her room she had all her blankets over her head like she was in her own little private world.

I went and sat in my bed. Reg used to lay right by my bed, the whole thought of it just made me really sad. I didn’t like to think that things were just over. I just didn’t like the idea of that, I can’t remember if I prayed or just wished that he could come back, even for a day. I told Reggie that I wish I could have said goodbye and that I always loved him as a dog. I told him that he could sleep in my bed tonight if he could just come back. Then I did something really stupid. I opened my window which looked out on my backyard and I called out to him, like he could hear me: “Reggie, it’s ok, I know you don’t like the outside too much so if you want, you can sleep in my bed tonight”

It was probably the dumbest thing I could have done. But it made me feel a little bit better.  I started thinking about Max’s dirty pants and Space Proximitas and how I was pretty sure I was too old for those books. Then I started to think about my dad asking me about my birthday and how my sister was all bundled up because of the storm and I just broke down and cried right there in bed. I don’t think I can explain it. Those things weren’t even sad. It just seemed like everything was changing so fast, I got so scared and I just lost it. Even the kiss from Trista was scary at that point. I just curled up into a ball and bundled up in all my blankets so I could be in my own private world and just pretended Reg was there.