So, here it is.
my confession.
Being three weeks in college at IU, I must say a few things, reflect on the good and the bad alike provided anyone is still reading this, if not, consider it my diary.
I like it here, I can say that and be completely honest with myself because its true. If it pleases anyone, there it is in black and white.
But would I write something like this if i didn't have something to complain about? Absolutely never, good job caller. The one thing that gets me, and it catches up with me on the darkest corners of a Friday night when I'm all tucked away and ready to sleep, I start to feel the aching of homesickness. I start to feel out of place and I start to wonder, "Do I like IU more than I like Irvington? Do the friends that I have made here compare to what I have left behind? Does the fact that I am happy here mean that I am happy enough?" My answers to all of those, for now, is no.
But could you blame me? "Its been only 3 weeks and this guy can't feel at home? What's he got to complain about."
The answer is, very little. What I have found here is something great, I call it "Delighted Existence." To be happy to just exist, to know that existence is not guaranteed by any means and to thrive is to conquer.
I am staying here for the rest of the year. No questions. Whether I stay longer or go someplace closer to home is still on the table. I think it would be great to stay here at IU for four years, but I just don't know if that's in the cards right now
-J
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